bad blogger, bad!

I have not posted a blog entry since April!!!  WHA??  Life got busy.  Let's see...I got married in a hospital in L.A. in May, my husband adopted my son, started my own graphic design business, got a new nephew, bought a new car (LOVE MY SOUL), planned a wedding (yes, I still had a wedding in October), helped do stuff for my sister's wedding in November, yesterday I got a new cousin, and all the little life stuff in between.  Here it is coming up on Thanksgiving in a couple of days and I have SO much to be thankful for.  I have been doing things I am thankful for every day on my Facebook status.  To keep myself focused, I did it in alphabetical order.  Each day was a letter and I listed things I was thankful for that started with that letter.  Even though I did it that way to make myself focus, I still had to censor myself so that my friends were not subjected to statuses that were multiple paragraphs long.  Truth is, I am thankful for everything in my life and everyone in it.  I could never list everything that I feel so lucky to have, or be a part of.  I could never list everyone that I am thankful to know, or have in my life.  My life is truly blessed and I hope that people can tell that through my actions and my attitude.  If when I die, people can look back and say "She really loved living", then I will be happy.  Never let a day go by, when you don't show thanks for something in your life.  Don't just be thankful on Thanksgiving.  

 My L.A. Hospital Wedding

 The complete audience at my L.A. hospital wedding.

 Family Pictures ~ Summer '11

 My new nephew ~ Lawson

My October Wedding

How Selfish of me....

I usually am not so negative, but yesterday, I woke with a horrible headache.  It was storming out and I had errands to run and I overslept.  I posted on my facebook status, something to the effect of "Overslept, woke with a headache and have to run errands in the rain.  This Monday sucks more than most.  Silver lining?  Anyone?".   I was promptly put in my place by several friends who reminded me that I was lucky to wake up to the day.  Crappy or not.
How could I be upset about such trivial things?  There are people all over that aren't lucky enough to wake to a new day, or people who wake up everyday in pain because of illness or disease.  There are people who wish to not wake up and here I am complaining about rain.
I am very lucky to have woken up to a new day.  I have a wonderful life and a wonderful family and am blessed daily.  Thank you to my friends who put my day into perspective and helped me to remember that I am truly blessed and should not take anything in my life for granted.  Crappy or not.  At least I have life to live.

Old is as old does...

Two days ago I turned 33 years young.  I say young because I don't often feel very old.  I have a LOT of life left in me and there are too many things I want to do in my life to just give up.  It was a typical Monday.  I slept late (mainly because Cooper was exhausted because of being up and down ALL night too) and then spent the morning playing legos with Cooper in his room.  He was so proud of the tiny lego thing we built that he left it up all day and had to show Chris the minute he got home.

 I made us lunch, nothing too exciting.  I think Coop had a pickle, yogurt, cheese and PB on toast (I know...great lunch, but when you have a picky toddler, you give him what you know he will eat AND we covered almost all the food groups).  After lunch came clean-up time.  As I was bending over to pick up the sippy cup that had been carelessly tossed on the floor, it happened.  My back seized up and stuck.  I threw my back out bending over??  And on my birthday, no less.  What an omen, right?  We shall see....

I got this fantastic heating pad for Christmas and wanted more than anything to put it on my back for a while.  There was only one problem.  It was behind the couch.  I could hardly change a diaper without crying, let alone climb behind the couch.  So I had to wait in agony until Chris got home from work.  Needless to say, the heating pad has found a new home.

Chris was wonderful!  He got home, gave Coop a much needed bath, went out and got Subway for dinner and brought me marshmellows from 240 Sweet.  Just two days prior he had brought me roses and gave me money for my birthday (which is going into the honeymoon fund).  He is also taking me to The Melting Pot on Friday.  My parents bought us tickets to Lady Gaga for my birthday, so we will be doing that on Saturday night.  What a birthday!

I am a very lucky girl and not a day goes by that I don't appreciate everything and everyone in my life.  So thrown out back or not, I still consider myself 33 years young.  I have a lot to experience in this life and am blessed to experience it with the people that I choose to surround myself with.

All in all, it was a pretty good birthday.  (Picture below of me and Cooper before the back incident. Oh yeah...we stayed in our jammies most of the day too!  *grin*)

Until next post...
Love each other.

Feel the Burn!!!

So, for most of my adult life, I have fought with my weight.  I have always been overweight and even at my smallest, was still curvy.  Before I had Cooper, I had lost quite a bit of weight and was feeling good about myself.  After Cooper was born, however, that all changed.  If you have had a child, you know that it completely changes your body.  My body changed quite a bit and I hated it.  I went out and bought a new wardrobe thinking that would help my self image.  It helped for a little while since I now had clothes that fit my new body, but eventually I felt bad about myself again, but not because of the way I looked.  I found it hard to run around and play with my toddler.  After 10 minutes of running around outside or chasing each other through the house, I was winded.  I was 31 years young and couldn't play with my son like he deserved! 

My mom helped me with the funds to sign up for the Metabolic Research Center program.  I did really well and lost 40 pounds in no time.  I was back down to my pre-pregnancy size. I felt great! 

THEN, I fell in love!  LOL   I got "fat and happy" and gained back 20 of the pounds I had worked so hard to lose. Chris has a HUGE sweet tooth and that is fine for him...he is skinny already.  He loves me  so much and he tells me all the time how much he loves my curves.  He loves me for who I am and I love him for it.  He says he wishes I could see myself as he sees me....and I would be fine with my weight, except that I want to be around for a LONG time for my son. 

I started WeightWatchers this week.  So far, so good.  I am finding it really easy to stay within my points and I still get a treat now and then.  I also started "Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred".  SHE is kicking my ass, but I feel really good after my workout and I know that it will all be worth it in the end, even if I CAN'T walk upright right now.  LOL

On a completely unrelated topic, I get to go try on wedding dresses this weekend.  Yay!

Until my next post,
Love each other....

My light in the dark....

I can't express enough how much my son means to me.  I am so thankful to be able to spend each and every day with this little, smart, bundle of energy.  He is so loving and he gives his love freely to everyone who treats him with kindness.  He makes me want to be the best role model that I can.  I never knew I could love someone so much.  


I think of him as a miracle.  I was never told that I couldn't have kids or that there was anything wrong that would cause me to be infertile, it was just something I had felt for most of my life.  I wanted kids.  I love kids.  I taught Preschool for 10 years and loved them.  Just something inside me made me feel that I would never be able to have any of my own.   I got the opportunity to take a job working from home making twice the money I was while teaching, so I jumped on it.  It was third shift, but the money was worth it.  Approximately two months after starting my new job, I found out that I was pregnant.  I was shocked, overjoyed, ecstatic....humbled.  


On my first trip to my OBGYN, I was given an ultrasound and found that I was 6 weeks along and that I had developed a cyst on my left ovary.  They told me that it should burst by the time I was 12 weeks along, but it didn't.  After Cooper was born, it was not only still there, but it had grown.  So, when Coop was 5 months old, I went to have it removed and in the process of removing it, they found that I had cysts all over my ovary as well.  They had to remove my ovary that day.  If it hadn't been for getting pregnant with Cooper, who knows how long I would have gone without knowing that I had this issue.  So, for that, I am thankful.  


However, that leaves me with one ovary and Chris and I would like to have more children.  We have decided that if we try and are not able to get pregnant, then we will definitely adopt.  I think we have decided that even if we are able to get pregnant, then we are going to adopt as well.  We have a lot of love to give and if we can give to a child who needs it more than most, then that's what we are going to do.  


But in the meantime, it's just Cooper and I plan to soak up all of his love and energy that I can.  He is a sponge and soaks up everything that I give him, so I should do the same. He wants me to hold his hand at night as he falls asleep and I will hold his hand as long as he will let me.  He wants our love and attention all the time and we will give it, even if later on he thinks he doesn't want it.  He is so easy to love.  I hope he thinks the same of me. 


Until next post,
Love each other. 

Brace Face

All my life I had crooked teeth.  The top front two were the worst.  Almost turned sideways even.  My parents didn't have insurance when I was growing up, and they couldn't afford to get me braces.  My parents owned their own cleaning business and they worked hard to give us the things we did have.  When I was in High School, they both went back to school.  I admire them so much for that.  They showed me that if you work hard, you can accomplish whatever you put your mind to.  Growing up poor taught us to appreciate what we had and to appreciate each other.  My family was very close and still is.  My parents are divorced now, but still we spend every birthday, Christmas, New Years and special occasion together.  I have never known another family like ours and I am so thankful for them.  Anyway, I digress.  My teeth were awful. I got made fun of a lot because of them.  Kids are just mean.  Some adults are just mean too, sadly enough.  By the time I was an adult, I had grown accustomed to my teeth.  They were a part of me.  They helped me to build character, BUT...I had a bad case of TMJ.  I was waking up every morning with headaches from clenching my teeth so bad at night.  When I chewed, you could hear my jaw popping across the room.  It had gotten to be painful, so at 30, I went to the orthodontist and got braces.  Within 6 months, my TMJ was gone.  2 and half years later, I still have my braces on.  I get them off at the end of this week.  I am excited, but also a little scared.  I don't exactly know why I am scared, I just am.  I feel like I am beginning a new chapter in my life.  This year is a whole new chapter and it begins with new teeth and ends with a wedding.  I can't wait to see my new smile.

Until my next post,
Love each other!

Meet my Family...

My little family is not perfect, but they are perfect for me.  


Cooper is the light of my life.  Every day with him is new and exciting.  He is always learning and he is incredibly smart.  I know everyone thinks that of their kid, but he really is.  I don't know many kids who are 25 months old who know how to work a TV remote or use scissors (of course, under supervision) or go get a tissue and blow their own nose.  He is a strong little man.  He was able to hold his head up on his own on the night he was born.  At 5 days old, he rolled over on his own for the first time.  My wish for him is that his character is as strong as his physical self.  He delights me every minute of every day.  All it takes to put me in a better mood is to see that beautiful little smile.  He is starting to talk a lot more.  His favorite question is "What is that?" with great annunciation on "that".  LOL   He has been asking that question for about 6 months now.  He wonders about EVERYTHING and I believe that he takes it all in when we answer him too.  He jabbers ALL the time.  He is always talking about something even if I don't know what it is.  He is addicted to chocolate milk.  We go through about a gallon and a half of milk a week, and Chris and I don't drink it!  He also drinks a lot of water and will sometimes choose water over chocolate milk, which is wonderful.  He LOVES bath time and thinks its funny to splash water all over the bath giver, which is usually Chris.  They have a routine that works best. He sleeps in his own toddler bed and has for about the last 6 months.  He still wakes during the night.  Sometimes quite a bit.  Usually the cause for his waking is that his pacifier has fallen out of his mouth.  I know....he shouldn't still have a paci, but its such a fight to get it away.  He is down to only having it during nap time and bedtime.  


When he was a newborn, he and I lived with my Mom, whom without her help, we would not have made it.  I owe her more than I could ever repay her.  Anyway, she has a very large window in the front of her house and Coop used to lay across the back of the couch watching out the window.  It was his favorite place to be, even as a wee tiny baby.  It is still his favorite place to be.  


When Coop was 11 months old, he and I bought a house.  Its not tiny, but its not huge.  Lets face it, I hate to clean house, so any bigger than this and I would go crazy.  It's enough to work a full time job, be a full time mom and keep a house clean too.  We have three bedrooms and two full baths, a basement, a dining room, living room, kitchen and sun room. I looked at several houses before I looked at our house.  As soon as I walked in this house, I felt like I was home, so we made an offer.  Thankfully, they accepted our offer and in we moved.  I saw "we", but I mean Cooper and me.  Chris wasn't in the picture YET. 


Cooper's bio-dad left the day after we came home from the hospital.  I begged him to come back.  I wanted a family for my son.  He came back and two months later I asked him to leave. I had taken enough disrespect and I had to do what I thought was best for my son.  There is a lot more to it, but I won't get into it on here.  Fast forward to 16 months after Coop's bio-dad was asked to leave.  A friend of mine talked me into getting on PlentyofFish.com.  I figured if she thought it was a good idea, then I would do it.  After all, she is gorgeous and should have no problem finding dates, but she is on there, so....I signed up.  I met (online) quite a few interesting people.  Some weird interesting, some intellectually interesting, and some were just rude.  I set up a few dates.  Went on the first one and it was the worst date I had ever been on in my life!  Won't bore you with the details, but a half hour into the date, I told him I had to check on my son.  I texted my little sister, whom I knew was going to be at a local club doing karaoke, and asked her to please call me and beg me to come there.  Ha.  Five minutes later, her now fiancee' called me to tell me to get over there, so I did, date in tow.  He stayed about 20 minutes and left.  After he left, a guy came and sat in his seat.  I thought he was good looking, but I am too shy to make the first move, so we sat there in silence.  He was there with my future brother-in-laws friend and I was there with my sister, so that is why we were all at the same table.  I had to go eventually, never exchanging even a word with the good looking stranger next to me.  


About 4 days later, I got a message on plenty of fish from a guy who worked at a local radio station.  His pictures weren't close up, so I couldn't tell what he really looked like, but we messaged back and forth that entire day.  I could not wait to get his next message.  He was so witty, and funny and smart and we really clicked through email.  Apparently he thought so too, because he couldn't wait to meet me and came to see me that very night.  We hit it off right off the bat, but I was hesitant to start anything serious because I thought I just wanted to date around.  A couple of days after my date, I was telling my sister and her beau about it.  They asked his name, and I told them.  A few minutes later, my sisters bf comes up to me with his phone and shows me Chris' facebook page.  He was the good looking guy sitting next to me at the bar that night just days before.  We didn't recognize each other from the bar but we have been inseparable since.  


Chris is truly the best man I have ever known.  I believe that everything happens for a reason and that I had to go through some of the horrible relationships I did, in order to truly appreciate him when he came along.  He lifts me up when I am down.  He encourages me to do whatever I want to do.  He supports whatever decisions I make.  He loves me unconditionally and he loves Cooper the same.  Cooper and I are extremely lucky.  Chris and I took things slow in the beginning, but were engaged just shy of 6 months after our first date.  We had been talking about getting married after 2 and a half months after our first date.  Our wedding is in October and I can. not. wait.  I am having a lot of fun planning it, but can't wait for it to get here so that I can become his wife. Everyone had always told me that when you know, you just know.  Now I know....


So, that's my family.  We enjoy gaming.  Video, card, board...we like them all.  We enjoy anything that we can do as a family.  Chris and I often play a game of Scrabble before bed after Cooper has gone down for the night.  We enjoy museums and traveling and going out to eat.  Basically if it enhances our together time as a family, we enjoy doing it.  We just love spending time together.  Coop makes us do group hugs and kisses.  He loves us and I hope that his love of family continues through the teen years, but until the time comes that he is too cool for Mom and Dad, I will soak it all up as much as I can.  


Until my next post,
Love each other!

A New Blog-ginning

I am starting this blog as a way to get out feelings and thoughts and to save memories.  I am hoping that it will help me to recognize what is good in my life (there are a lot of good things), and sometimes I lose sight of them.  I am hoping that it will be cathartic.  I believe that in life, we all need a fair bit of catharsis at times. I am blogging for me, not for anyone else.  However, if what I blog helps someone else, or brings a smile to someone else's face, then that is just an added bonus.

A LOT of my blogs will probably include things that my son, Cooper,  has done or said.  He is my light.  My life.

I have started to write a book, but am not getting too far.  As you will probably see in this blog, my thoughts are alllll over the place.  My written thoughts are a reflection of my mind....busy.  I have a lot of stuff swimming around in there and sometimes my fingers are not fast enough to get it all out in an orderly fashion.

I may also use this space to rant a fair bit.  I have a lot of opinions and being a work from home mom, have no one to spout off to during the day.  Cooper is not much of an audience.  My rants are not meant to offend or upset anyone.  They are just my opinions and from what I have been taught, everyone is entitled to one.

When I was comtemplating starting a blog, a dear friend reminded me that never in my life have I thought about doing something.  If I want to do it, I just do it.  I have always been this way and now is no time to start doing things differently.

So, until next post....

Love each other!